$COUCHFART didn’t trend , it erupted.

Not with a whisper, but with a seismic squeak — the sacred sound of the forgotten furniture uprising.

From the depths of every sunken cushion, every spring-tortured frame, rose a force. A smell. A spirit. A stain on the blockchain you can’t scrub off.

This isn’t just a coin. It’s a calling. A flatulent flame passed from cheek to cheek, sofa to sofa.

Analysts didn’t see it coming. Devs didn’t dare dream it. But the couches knew. They always knew.

$COUCHFART is a resistance baked into the fabric — quite literally. A decentralized discharge of destiny.

Old La-Z-Boys became generals. Loveseats formed alliances. Fold-out beds plotted in silence.

And you? You sat there thinking, “Is this real?”

Yes. It’s as real as the dent you left watching 12 hours of Netflix straight. This isn’t hype. It’s gas-fueled inevitability.

So plug your nose, open your wallet, and embrace the puff-pocalypse.

Because you don’t buy $COUCHFART. You inherit it.

Join the ministry of musk. The sacred stink awaits.

linktr.ee/depressedcouchfart

TG: DepressedCouchFart

CA: CUCkibMeeFG1rYWhxnaPqHeACbjg4hX4NSDstohHpump